The Worst Pies In London Chords & Lyrics - Stephen Sondheim

[MRS. LOVETT]
A costumer!
[A]Wait! What's your rush? What's your hurry?
You gave me such a... fright!
I thought you was a ghost!
Half a minute, can't ya [A]sit?
Sit ya do[D]wn! Sit!
All I meant is that I haven't seen a customer for weeks
Did ya come here for a p[A]ie, sir?
Do forgive me if me head's a little va[A]gue
What was that?
But you'd think we'd have the plague
[A]From the way that people keep avoiding
No, you do[C#m]n't!
[C#m]Heaven knows I t[A]ry, sir!
But there's no one comes in even to inhale
[A]Right you [F]are, sir, would you l[C]ike a drop of al[Dm]e?
Mind you I can hardly b[F#m]lame them
[C#m]These are probably the wo[F#m]rst pies in London
[C#m]I know why nobody c[F#m]ares to take them
I should know
I m[E]ake 'em
But g[D#m]ood? No...
The w[D]orst pies [C#m]in Lo[F#m]ndon...
[C#m]Even that's polite! The worst pies in Lond[F#m]on!
If you do[C#m]ubt it take a bite!
Is [F#m]that just disgusting?
You h[C#m]ave to concede it
It's n[E]othing but crusting
Here d[B]rink this, you'll ne[D]ed it
The w[C#m]orst pies in London
And no [C#m]wonder with the price of [C]meat
What it is
When you get it
Never thought I'd live to see the day
Men'd think it was a treat findin' p[F]oor animals
[C]What are dyin' in the street
[F]Mrs. Mooney [E]has a p[A]ie shop
[D]Does a b[A]usiness but I notice something we[A]ird
Lately, all her neighbors cats have dis[A]appeared
Have to hand it to her!
What I calls ente[E]rprise!
[A]Poppin' pussies into pies!
[C#m]Wouldn't do in m[A]y shop!
Just the thought of it's enough to make you sick
And I'm telling you them pussycats is quick
No denying times is [F#m]hard, sir!
[C#m]Even harder than the [F#m]worst pies in London
Only lard and nothing more
Is that just revolting?
All gre[C#m]asy and gritty?
It lo[E]oks like it's m[B]olting
And tastes like... W[D]ell, pity
A wo[C#m]man alone!
With limited wind
And the w[F#m]orst p[G#m]ies in Lon[B]don!
Ah, s[C#m]ir
Times is hard
Times is h[F#m]ard!