5050 chords

[C]Close your eyes, m[C7]ake a wish, [Fmaj7]picture your perfect w[G]oman
Now o[C]pen your eyes and f[C7]orget about her cause I’m he[Fmaj7]re and I’m not i[G]t
And bef[Fmaj7]ore we go any further
There’s a fe[G]w things I’d like to admit

I’m a [Am]self-absorbed workaholic
My mind is always divi[D]ded
My sch[Am]edule is erratic, just like my thoughts
I’m ea[D]sily depressed or overly excited whoo!

I[Am] can’t do anything around the house
If y[D]ou want food you gotta cook it yourself
And if we st[Fmaj7]op having sex, I will leave
I[G] have friends that give me everything else

I’ve got go[Am]als and dreams and aspirations
I[D]’ve got shit to do
I’[Fmaj7]m not gonna change all my plans
[G]Just to be with you

Yeah we’re a p[E]erfect couple
If you’re totally comfortable b[Fmaj7]eing alone
We’ll al[E]ways be together
If it’s c[Fmaj7]ool that I’m never home
If you like ov[E]ercompensation for boundless insecurity
This is wh[Fmaj7]ere it’s at
And if you n[D]otice I’ve been talking about myself this whole time
Well, g[G]et ready for more of that

And I’m like lo[Am]ok at me look at me watch me watch me
[Am]Listen to me listen to this what do you think
[Am]Tell me the truth compliments only ple[G]ase
N.C.
Oh man you really get me

[C]I’m gonna make your dreams come true
[Fmaj7]As long as they don’t interf[G]ere with mine
[C]I’ll always be here for you
For me[Fmaj7]thodically allotted a[G]mounts of time
[Em]I’ll be there to[Am] hold your hand
If I ha[D]ppen to be in town
And a[Fmaj7]ny time you need me
There’s a 50[G]/50 chance I’ll [C]be [Fmaj7]around [G]

[Am]I know this all sounds bad
But you kn[Em]ow what else is true
Ev[Fmaj7]ery word that I just said
Could hav[G]e also been describing you
Yes every[Fmaj7] word that I just said
C[G]ould have also been describing[C] y[Fmaj7]ou [G]

[Am]You just don’t feel bad about it
[D]It’s never even occurred to you
[Am]To not go after all the things
[D]You’ve ever wanted to
[Am]You weren’t subconsciously conditioned
[D]To give up your dreams for me
Or that[Fmaj7] loved and ambitious
Were[G] mutually exclusive things to be

[E]It probably didn’t cross your mind
That [Fmaj7]your mom had goals too
That had [E]nothing to do with getting married
And n[Fmaj7]othing to do with having you
[E]Can we stop pretending
That i[Fmaj7]t isn’t kind of sad
That[D] your mom never pursued anything
With the [G]same intensity as your dad

[Am]And right now you’re thinking
[G]Not my mom, that was her decision
[Fmaj7]Okay, sure, but all our moms
[G]That’s what they all envisioned...

[C]

Kate: 'You know whenever my mom...
Riki: Kate, no
Kate: Are you sure? Because she always...
Riki: Kate! No
Kate: What about Lesley's mom?
Riki: No Kate! None of the moms! None of the moms
Kate: None of the moms!

So therefore…

[C]I’m gonna make your dreams come true
[Fmaj7]As long as they don’t inte[G]rfere with mine
[C]I’ll always be here for you
[Fmaj7]For methodically allotted amo[G]unts of time
[Em]I’ll be there to [Am]hold your hand
[D]If I happen to be in town
[Fmaj7]And any time you need me
[G]There’s a 50/50 chance I’ll b[C]e [Fmaj7]around[G]

[Am]Look I’ll meet you halfway there
[D]But I can’t give you more than that
[Am]And know it’s not as sweet of a deal
[D]As every man ever before you had

[Fmaj7]All I want[E] is 50/50
[Fmaj7]All I want is half
[D]And if those numbers seem off to you
[G]Why?

[C]It doesn’t mean I won’t be your partner
[C7]It doesn’t mean I won’t come through
[Fmaj7]It doesn’t mean I’m a bad person
[G]It just means I’m the same as you

[C]So if you’re looking for an equal [C7]you found it
[Fmaj7]But if want someone better than you, [G]try again
[Fmaj7]Cause I only have what it takes to[G] be man
[Fmaj7]I’ve never had what it[G] takes to be a w[C]oman