My Unfortunate Erection Chips Lament chords

[CHIP, spoken] Db
Fritos! M&M’s? Oreos! All for one dollar!

It is tradition
That the[Ebm] person eliminated
[Am]From the competition
Is [Adim]fair-game for derision [Db]
Especially the [Gbm]alpha-male
[Ab]Who'll sell goodies at the bake sale [Db]

Anyone for brownies?

Anyone for choc'late chips?
[Gb]Anyone for anything that isn’t dated?[Db]
[Ab7]How could I
Have been[Gb]

Elimina -[Ab] ted[Ab7] ?
You wanna know how? [Ab] [Ab7]
You wanna know how? [Ab] [Ab7]
You wanna know why? [Ab] [Ab7]
[Db]My unfortunate erection [Bbm7]
[Eb7]Is destroying my p[Ab7]erfection
[Db]It is my r[Dbm]eco -[Ebm7] llection
That eve[Db]rything I once did [Gb]

I did perfectly

[Db] [B] "Last year’s ch[Gb]amp defeated!"
[A]Because of [Db]

Marigold Coneybear
Because there’s something [Gb]
And not a thing [F]between us [Db]
I d[Ebm7]on’t blame my brain
But I do[Ab] blame my penis
[Db]My unfortunate protuberance [Bbm7]
[Eb7]Seems to have its own exub[Ab7]erance
[A]Anyone for M&M’s?

Delicious and appropriate
[Db]Anyone for Chewy Goobers?

Expensive
[Eb]Anyone for buying the shit that I’m selling?
Becau[Ab]se my stiffy has ruined my spelling
[Db] Ere[Ab] - [Db]ction
Ere[B]ction
My unfortuna[Bbm]te erec - tion [Ebm] [Bbm] [Db]
Whoa [B]
[Ab] It’s ruining my life [Ab5]

It’s ruining my world
It’s ru[Ab]ining my ruining
Ruining, ruining my life [Db] [Gb]
My life![Db] [Gb] [Db]
Adulthood brings its own peculiar rejection [F] [F7]
Which is why I’[Ab]m selling this PTA confection [Db]

It will ruin your complexion [Gb] [Bbm7]
[A] All because of my unfor - tu - n[Ab]ate [Db] [Gbm] [Ab]
E[Gbm]rec [Ab] -[Db] t[A]ion
[Gbm]Oh, [Db] God!